What a humiliation.
A lot of unhappiness around the Bernabéu tonight,
a lot of it directed at Gavin Harris. Came out as a hero,
he's being called a donkey tonight.
Ronaldinho seals it with a brilliant third.
Boy, do they need some inspiration from somewhere.
And now it's Munez. And we haven't seen too much of him today.
Trying a give-and-go here with Alan Shearer.
What a great run by Munez!
Unbelievable! Newcastle's newest and youngest player
gives the fans a brand-new song to sing.
He's got support to his right.
Stephen Carr.
A great header!
And a goal!
It's a dream start for Newcastle!
- OK. - What about the rose petals?
About bloody time. Can we have the red rose petals, but in that...?
- Gotta get back to work. - Hey, babe.
- OK. Hello. - Hey.
Just no fuss.
I've got to go, but I will see you Tuesday.
- All right. Bye. - Bye-bye.
San, it's ten of 5.00. The meeting with the wedding planner was at 4.00.
Sorry, babe. I just... I lost track of time.
- We do this together. - What do I know about flowers?
As long as you show up, I'll be happy.
You Latin boys are so cheeky. Do you know that?
- Are you gonna show up? - I might, if you're lucky.
Oh, no. Go and have a shower. You stink.
It's time for a toast, I think.
To your new home, may all your ups and downs be in the bedroom.
Mom!
You might want to be careful, Santi. Look where it got me!
You're lucky I let you get near me.
- How about the extra hot vindaloo? - Sounds good.
Have consideration. I'm the one who has to sleep with him.
It sounds good.
- Hello, stranger. - Hello.
What happened? Did you lose me number?
- Good timing. We're ordering. - Can I have a word?
- Yeah, sure. - In private?
Excuse us.
Oh, my God.
I've been on the phone for hours.
Are they serious?
They want to meet us.
- Shtoom, though, OK? - Yeah.
You've got two more years with Newcastle.
The fans'll go mad. You're the best player.
It's just a meeting.
So when are they coming to meet us?
They're not. I'm meeting them in Japan.
The biggest football club on the planet.
Nine times European champions. Twenty-nine Spanish League titles.
Twelve Spanish Cups. One Super Cup.
They come to Tokyo every summer, the whole squad.
Beckham, Raúl, Ronaldo, Roberto Carlos,
Zidane, Harris, Munez.
Won't be long, don't worry.
Thank you for coming.
- Santi, how are you? - Fine thank you.
Welcome to this legendary football club.
I wanted to introduce you to our coach.
- Van der Merwe. - Pleased to meet you.
- Sorry you had to come so fast. - That's fine.
We want Santiago. We can make this work.
We have to act quickly. The transfer window closes tomorrow at midnight.
- I know. Let's vamoose. - OK. Come on.
Just don't think about the money.
You're gonna hate Madrid. They all speak bloody Spanish.
- How's it going? - Good.
- We haven't said yes yet. - What, are you mad?
With ten percent you have your chest waxed and highlights. You're sorted.
It's a big decision. Roz and I got this new house.
You came halfway around the world for karaoke?
No one says no to Real Madrid, you nutter.
I don't wanna be on the bench like Owen. He's one of the best. I'd go crazy.
- It's Dutch. - Gentlemen.
Herr Van der Merwe. Can I get you a drink?
Thank you. You're not giving any career advice, are you?
He's pretending he's got a decision to make.
I have some advice.
First, you listen to your heart.
Then you listen to your head.
Then your wife will tell you what to do.
You're OK, Mr. Ives.
Sorry, doctor.
No comment!
Don't leave, Santi! Don't leave!
[woman on TV] Michael Owen acknowledges the Newcastle fans
as they welcome him to St. James's Park.
The last-minute exchange deal with Real Madrid
will see Santiago Munez move to Real Madrid on a two-year contract.
- Excuse me. You know where Roz is? - Down to the left.
Thank you.
There's that git, upsetting my lovely Rosalind.
You're in the bad books now.
- Hey, you save your breath, Mr. Ives. - Baby.
- I don't want to talk to you. - I tried to call.
- You should've asked for more time. - I tried. Hey, listen.
I love you. I love you and I want to marry you. None of that changes.
Now, before we have kids and responsibilities, we can...
- Stop playing with the bed. - I'm sorry.
We can go places, do things. Just you and me.
I'm not sure I want to live in Spain. I mean...
- I love Newcastle. - I love it too. It's been good to me.
If I hadn't come I wouldn't have found the most important thing in my life:
- You. - He's got a point there.
Yeah, and what about our wedding and our new house and my job? I love my job.
- I know, but... - I've got exams at Easter.
You can see me on your days off, how's that? I'll fly back when I can.
Baby, I can't walk away from this chance.
This is my life, and I want you there... with me.
- I can't even speak Spanish. - I'll teach you.
I'm not eating paella.
Hey, hey, hey. Come here.
Will you do us a favor? When you see that Gavin Harris,
tell him he's shite.
- I love you. - I love you.
A very good day to all of you
and thank you for coming
to this very important presentation
of one of the greatest players in the world
Good luck in this team.
Best wishes and we place our hopes in you.
Many thanks.
Over ten thousand fans turned up to welcome Real's latest signing...
Newcastle United fans are still coming to terms with the loss of Santiago,
two years before the end of his contract...
...in exchange for Michael Owen has shocked fans...
...the Mexican-born striker runs the risk of sitting on the bench.
How much do you think this one cost?
I couldn't care less if the Bernabéu goes bankrupt.
We have the best strikers. We all know that.
They compete with each other.
No player wants to be on the bench for a long time.
I'm sure it's not that different for Mr. Munez.
Well, I've always been a fan of Real Madrid. Me, my grandma, my brother.
It's like a dream come true for me to be playing on this team, yeah.
Goal!
Is it true only a year ago you were a gardener?
I'm from a simple background. My story's different than most of the players.
- Rosa. Rosa! - For me, it's a big thing.
A big responsibility.
The omelet. It's lunchtime.
I'll try to be at the same level.
It's an honor to play with great players like Zidane and David,
Roberto Carlos, everybody, so...
You're prepared for everything about to hit you?
- First day of school. Make me proud. - I will, Mama.
- Miss Harmison? - Hey.
Where have you been? Training or shopping? Oh, my God.
- It's for us, baby. It's for us. - Have they given you all this?
- Wow. Can I have one? - Sure. They're for you.
Pick a car. Any car.
- You'll have to score a lot of goals. - I'll try.
The UEFA Champions League is back, and it's back at the Santiago Bernabéu.
What a stage for Europe's top club competition.
- Hey. - Look at this.
Oh, my God.
Look at that.
Real Madrid, nine times winners. But not now for four years.
This is where they kick off their latest campaign.
An unhappy time for Gavin Harris. He has a point to prove.
- Cheers. Good luck. - Cheers.
The new boy, Munez. He starts from the bench.
Gavin Harris. He hasn't scored for 14 games. The wait goes on.
Half a yard behind, isn't he?
Just over half an hour to go.
Again the delivery. No finish.
Harris again trying to influence proceedings. He's struggling tonight.
One on one, that should have been a goal.
Harris off the mark, off his game.
And the crowd's starting to get on the Englishman's back.
- Oh, yeah, look, there he is. - It's time for a new star.
Does this spell the end for Gavin Harris?
It's certainly the start of something new for Santiago Munez.
- Go, Sant. - Go on, Santi.
Munez ghosting in. He's looking menacing.
Oh, dear, it's all coming to the boil. Thomas Gravesen's brought his handbag.
Beckham's corner.
Not cleared, only as far as Munez.
Could this be the moment?!
Yes! Yes!
It could not be a better start to his Real Madrid career.
A last-minute goal for Santiago Munez.
- Enrique! - Come on, come on.
- Did you bring the dough? - Quick, before they catch us.
OK, OK, this is for you and this is for me.
What's in that head of yours?
What do you want? For us to visit you in jail?
Listen...
...one false move, and you will ruin your life forever.
More ruined than it already is?
Enrique my love, don't say that.
Look at that player, Munez.
He didn't have anything, like you.
Look at him now.
Apart from that, what the hell does that have to do with me?
I'm going to tell you a secret. That player is your brother.
Santi! Over here!
- OK, OK. Take it easy. - Santi!
- Come on out, darling. - Careful. Are you all right?
- Are you OK? - I broke my heel off.
Come on inside. I've got a little surprise for you. This way.
That's for you.
Come on in. And follow me. Follow me.
That's for you.
- Come on. This way. - What was that?
Come on. Patience.
And pick her up. She can't walk.
And that's for you.
Come here. I think he wants a photo.
Here we go.
- So is it always like this or what? - It is, actually. They're all mad.
- Total lunatics. - You don't sound surprised.
- You love it. - What, being in the press?
I'll tell you what. At the end of the day,
I'd rather be out with my friends having a nice meal, nice conversation.
Let it breathe for one minute.
OK. There's more to life than just football.
What, like computer games?
- Come on, you're in the first team. - Don't get me wrong.
It pays the bills. I do love it, but I've got other interests as well.
I mean, for example, wine.
I've made an investment in a tasty little vineyard in France.
Could be my future, you know?
- I think it's corked. - No, no, it's Covio de Special Reserve.
Jump on the plane with us. No one will know.
- I think the coach might notice. - The house is so empty without you.
- It's only a couple of weeks. - I don't want to go.
- It'll be like you never left. - I love you.
Me too.
- I'll call you, OK? - OK.
- Anything you need, give me a ring. - Thank you.
ONE MONTH LATER
Sant, I'm desperate for the toilet.
Look at the pool, at the gorgeous pool.
Hey, happy birthday.
- Didn't need to. I've got everything. - I won't bother next time. 29 again?
Watch it.
I really need a wee. Where's the toilet?
- Back here. - See you in a minute.
In that room. It's a bit of a wait, I'm afraid.
What do you think? It's not bad, is it?
Different class. How can you afford?
I don't know. Barry sorts all that out.
Hey, Barry! How can I afford this?
Because I get you 80 grand a week, you plank.
Oh, yeah. It's because I'm on 80 grand a week.
I've got something for you.
Off you pop then, treacle. Santi, what's up, man?
Listen, you scored an absolute belter tonight, love. You smashed it, bubba.
Listen. What're you thinking bringing Roz up here?
This is what we call a bona fide singles party, do you get me?
- She's my fiancée. - Hey, Barry. Hey.
Châteauneuf du Pape 1982. See what you think of that.
- Nice. - Come on. Let's go outside.
Oh, Santi. I've got a little idea for you, love.
- Who's that? - No idea.
So how many rooms is this?
I think it's eight. But I've only been in six.
I'm leasing it, and one of the rooms was locked...
Well, but it's sort of, like, a little bit weird.
It's those Euro-style bathing suits.
I don't think I'll wear it.
- Hey, monkey. - Hello.
- Where you been? - Introduce me to your friend?
Who, him? Jordana Garcia, Santiago Munez.
- She can't resist me. - I'll try.
Hi, Santiago.
Hi, how are you?
Hmm, Dolce?
Dolce, yes, yes.
Really good goal, eh?
Thanks, but I only played for seven minutes, so I wasn't...
Well, you must be really tired then?
Lovely ass. I want him.
- But I thought he had a girlfriend. - And who cares?
Roz. Hiya, darling. It's so great to see you.
Have you seen Santi?
I think he just popped upstairs with Gav.
- You look absolutely splendid. - Thank you.
- Can I get you a drink? - No. I'm going to find Santi.
- See you later. - See you.
There you are. I've been looking everywhere.
- Hi. - Roz, this is Jordana.
- Hello. - Hi.
He was telling me about your wedding. You're lucky.
- Not as lucky as he is. - True.
- Can we go in? It's a bit cold. - Yeah. Sure.
OK, then, you'll have to come on my TV show
before the other channels grab you, no?
Well, thanks, but I'm not into all that stuff.
Did you just say no to me?
You'll like it.
I've been cornered by Barry. It was disgusting.
He's such a lech. His hands were all over me.
She walked around without a top all night. She's a slut.
- Glad we're home. That was mad. - Gavino sure was in his element.
What did you think of that TV girl?
- TV girl? Who? - You know who I mean.
The one, "Did you just say no to me?" Her? Silly cow. Think she's hot?
Don't you pause! What do you mean? You just paused! You can't say yes.
She's OK. I think Gavino has a thing for her, actually.
- She definitely likes you. - I'm irresistible, what can I do?
I don't think so. I could take you or leave you.
- I can change that. - Do you?
I think so, yeah.
Sant, why are we here?
This is our house.
- You've bought it? - Yeah, I did.
- Oh, you haven't. - Yeah. What do you think? Come.
Sant!
- Look. - Oh, my God, it's massive.
Look at the size of it. It's beautiful. It's amazing.
Oh, wow! I like the kitchen.
- It's great. - Yeah.
This house belonged to a very famous designer. What's his name?
Well, they say he's gonna be the next Versace.
A lot of the things inside and the furniture were designed by him.
- We have seven bedrooms... - Seven?
- Yeah. And seven bathrooms. Cheers. - Cheers.
- Do you like it? - Don't know what to say.
Santi! Santi! Sant!
I'd like to talk for a second about this new arrival,
the Mexican Santiago Munez
who we see here entering this restaurant looking very handsome.
He's also a total fashion victim.
- He'll be worse in the future. - I really like his style.
Is he more Prada, or more Dolce?
Well, we'll have to keep an eye on him.
He'll be Dolce & Gabbana.
I'm betting on Prada.
I'm not sure his girlfriend will help much.
She looks pretty, if a bit pale but...
- Hello. - Hello, pet.
- Hey, Mom, how are you? - Oh, I'm fine.
You're in all the magazines over here.
- Are they new shoes you're wearing? - Yes, Mom.
- Were you talking to Victoria? - I don't even know her.
Oh, David's looking gorgeous.
- Listen, love. - Yes, Mom?
I think you need to let your hair down, pet. And, Roz...
What, Mom?
Well, you could do with a bit of a spray tan.
...immobility...
- Darling, I'm trying to study. - You can study on the plane.
I can't. I've got to get this finished.
- But I won't see you for two weeks. - I know.
Please. Can you watch TV or something?
- It's me, you idiot. - Sorry, it didn't sound like you.
- You busy? - I'm always busy, monkey.
I'm at the hotel and they're not letting us out.
It's a funny farm here. I'm locked up with a bunch of dimwits.
- You should feel at home then. - Seriously.
How about sneaking in?
You could come up in one of them laundry baskets.
Not tonight. I need my beauty sleep. I look awful.
Oh, shut it!
- Who else is there? - Íker, Guti,
- Iván, Munez. - Can you put Munez on?
Munez!
Íker, grow up.
Yes. Santi speaking.
Hi, Santiago, yes.
The thing is, my producers are crazy about having you on the show.
and I told them that, as a personal favor, you would give me the exclusive.
Hm, I don't know.
You're not afraid, are you?
Hey, Gavino! Open this! Hey! Please!
Another important UEFA Champions League night for Real Madrid.
Whoever you are in this competition, no matter how big or small,
it's vitally important...
You could pay someone to do that for you. Professionals.
I like doing it, Mom. Makes the place feel like home.
His head is bound to be full of a million different things right now.
- You should be one of them. - I've got to be here.
They need me at the hospital. Even if I was, I couldn't see him.
He's locked in hotels most of the week.
What's the point of having this classy house if there's only you in it, pet?
I'm serious, love. It may only be a few hundred miles to Madrid,
but if you let it, it could become a world away.
What is that?!
Nice shot!
Enrique, clean the ashtrays.
No, I'm watching the football.
When they pay you to watch TV, you'll be loaded.
Until then, get up and work, like everybody else.
Santiago Munez, super sub!
How long can the calls for a start be resisted by the manager?
- Good goal, man. - You OK?
Mr. Harris, what's going on with you? You were a disaster.
Are you ever going to score another goal?
Yeah. At this moment in time, I am a very bad player.
Hey, coach?
- Munez. - Can I have a word?
Sure.
Well, I'm feeling great. I'm fit, I'm scoring goals
and I think I'm ready to start a full game.
When you are ready to start, Munez,
I promise you, you'll be the first to know.
Hey, baby. You won't believe what I just bought for us.
- Go on. - Guess. Come on!
- I don't know, Sant. - Come on, come on!
I'm not really in the mood for games.
Lamborghini. White convertible Spyder. Different class.
Roz?
Mr. Ives died this morning.
I was gonna phone you, but I didn't want to bring you down.
- I'm sorry, baby. - I've got to go.
Do you think Munez is ready for a full game?
I think it's too early.
Maybe you should think again.
What's wrong with you, man? Can't you see I almost killed you!
My name is Enrique, I'm your brother.
What?
My mother married your father,
Hernan Munez in Mexico.
The client's screaming down my throat. I don't know what I'll say.
Mr. Munez, I'm glad you could make it, sir.
Do you mind?
We're going straight through to the studio.
- How long will it take? - Not too long if we go straight though.
- Rolling. - 104, take 27.
And action!
That's why I go for Total Tofu every time.
"The super food for the super sub."
All right, cut!
Great. That was great.
One more time, then, Santiago.
Did you do that?
Well, it says here you did, Phil.
- Santiago! - Hey, Glen.
These people are making a fool out of me, man.
- Who, Sant? - This commercial.
David Beckham gets Gillette, and I get freaking... tofu?
You got to start somewhere, Santiago. It's good money. You shouldn't complain.
No, it's disgusting!
You try eating it for five hours. Give me a break. Please.
- I'll have a word with... - You know what? I'm better than this.
- Jesus. - Was that Santiago?
Aye, it was.
For the first time this season, Van der Merwe has a decision to make.
He's got Santi Munez and Gavin Harris,
and Gavin appears to have been on his holidays this season.
You're talking five million for the boy.
At the moment, it doesn't look like he's worth a fiver to me.
- Hey. - Surprise!
I'm glad to see you.
Cheeky git. He just ran in front of the car?
There you go.
Are you all right? You look a bit in shock. Hey.
Come on, it'll be all right. Eat your dinner.
Well, did he say anything else?
No, nothing. When he threw that at me,
I was so freaked I just drove off. I couldn't breathe.
It might not be bad. You always talked about wanting to find her.
I know. But right now, I can't deal with it. In my head, she was gone forever.
She does really look like you.
- Hey. - Santiago.
- Where did you get this? - Is it her, Grandma?
When you went to Spain, I worried this might happen.
Wait, you knew?
I couldn't tell you, Santiago. I didn't want to cause you pain.
My God. You didn't tell me?
- What gave you the right? - That woman left all of us.
She just walked away. Left your father in pieces.
But it's my choice. She's my mother.
She abandoned you. How can you forgive her for that?
OK, Grandma. Let me decide, please.
Santi! Santi! Santi!
Santi, you listening?
It's a very big night for that young man.
Santiago Munez, for the first time since his move from Newcastle,
starts a game for Real Madrid.
Illustrious company alongside him, to say the least.
Just look at those names.
They tend to be feisty, these encounters between Real Madrid and Valencia.
It's Beckham forward early on.
He's picked out Munez. Raul alongside him,
but Munez goes for goal and glory himself.
Wanted the glory, but I don't think Raul's happy.
Perhaps he wanted that one squared.
Raul!
Ramos back to clear off the line.
David Beckham now.
Just about hooked away by Valencia. Under a bit of pressure here.
But now they can counter. Picked up by Vicente, taken down by Santi Munez.
Now Munez could be in real trouble here. He is! It's a red card.
Munez sent off on his first start for Real Madrid.
Well, it's unbelievable, isn't it?
That's a man who's rusty. A late challenge.
He gave the referee nowhere to go. Vicente was really clipped down.
And it's a sad day for Munez.
From dreams to nightmares for Santi Munez.
His first start, and now his first early bath.
Off comes Zinedine Zidane, and it's Gavin Harris who will come on.
Plenty of tackles flying in out there, and that's Guti.
Cañizares, what is he doing? Not just with his hair either.
This is not a typical Real Madrid game, is it?
The early sending-off has really set the tone for the match.
And another effort blocked away by Casillas.
And the follow-up just wide.
Down to ten men, it'll be very hard work for Real Madrid.
They have to get their passing game going. Beckham with a free kick.
Even he's not quite found his range tonight.
David Beckham with the cross.
Here's Gavin Harris! Goal for Real Madrid! And they lead one-nil!
The drought is over.
That's a goal poacher's goal. It was a great cross by Beckham.
Harris is there in the six-yard area doing what he does best,
and stoops to conquer.
So Real Madrid scraping home in the end, that late goal from Gavin Harris.
But Santiago Munez's moment of madness
nearly cost them the game,
a red card he could have no excuse about.
It was a poor foul, poor challenge, reckless.
The referee had no option, he had to go.
Gavin, this was your first goal in 17 games. How do you feel?
It's a great day. I'm very happy.
I'm going drinking with lots of girls.
Good night.
Hello, hothead.
Hello.
Look, I have the solution to all your problems.
Really?
Tequila, please.
And I need you on my show tomorrow
whilst you're still playing for Madrid.
You won't give up, will you?
What do you think?
Another?
Another please.
You started it. I didn't.
Do you need a ride?
No, thanks.
- Bye. - Bye.
Sant? Darling?
Sweetheart, wake up.
Come on, sleepyhead. Darling?
Look, I've brought you breakfast. Do you want some juice?
You've been asleep for ages. Here.
- Sant. - Why didn't you wake me up?
- I tried. You were dead to the world. - Try harder!
- I told you to wake me up! - I tried...
You stupid? I'm gonna miss the team plane!
I'm not stupid. I'm not an alarm clock!
- Hi. Trondheim, first class. - OK. I'll see what I can do.